Heroes of the East (1978)

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Heroes of the East (1978)

A light, domestic drama turns into a battle for national pride in this masterpiece from Lau Kar-leung – a wry, empathetic study into Chinese and Japanese fighting systems.

Privileged kung fu student Ah To (Gordon Liu) is arranged to be married to the daughter of one of his father’s Japanese business associates. He initially feigns illness as a ruse to have the wedding postponed, but Koda (Yuko Mizuno) turns out to be a stunner, so he changes his mind. Koda is also a karate nut who quickly moves all of her Japanese weaponry into the house and starts smashing through the …

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The Holy Virgin vs. the Evil Dead (1991)

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The Holy Virgin vs. the Evil Dead (1991)

This perverted supernatural thriller is far too hyperactive to ever be suspenseful, despite leanings towards Sam Raimi’s schlock horror classic The Evil Dead, most notably in the film’s use of handheld camera, wind machines and mood lighting. It works much better as a scatterbrained exploitation flick and is a uniquely Hong Kong experience, shotgunning from grisly scenes of hearts being ripped out to a light Cantopop romance, a comedic tough cop routine, a machine gun battle in a cave, a few fantastical wire-fu fights and a rampant assortment of Cat III sex scenes, all in the same breath.

Sibelle Hu is one of …

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Satan Returns (1996)

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Satan Returns (1996)

A misty, brooding horror comedy which deals – somewhat opaquely – with the creeping fear of Hong Kong’s impending Chinese takeover, depicting an unsettled police force tackling an alien presence calling itself ‘the Antichrist’. Francis Ng goes full lunatic to play Judas, a confused Satanist on a twisted crusade to rip out the hearts of young women on his homemade crucifix. Chingmy Yau is the inspector assigned to the case who is battling her own personal demons, circulating mostly around a missing father who may or may not have been the devil reincarnated, making her the devil’s daughter. Wong Jing’s …

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Shanghai Knights (2003)

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Shanghai Knights (2003)

Shanghai Noon was the surprise comedy hit of 2000, which teamed the slapstick athletics of Jackie Chan with the dry wit of deadpan comedian Owen Wilson to remarkably good effect. A sequel was inevitable, and this is it: a highly enjoyable follow up which sees cowboys Chan and Wilson travel to Victorian England on a quest for revenge. A sword-fighting royal kills Chan’s father and the Chinese Imperial Seal is stolen, and before you can say “buddy movie”, the two likable leads are in London, kicking up a fuss with the locals. Although the story aimlessly wanders into some nonsense …

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The Dragon, the Hero (1979)

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The Dragon, the Hero (1979)

“Dying time”, exclaims Phillip Ko in a ridiculously deep overdub as he rotates mini egg timers before pounding the life out of an unfortunate adversary. It’s all in the name of progress, apparently; how else can he and his lunatic boss (Chan Lau) expect to sell on a stash of stolen antiques to some dastardly westerners? Luckily, Tino Wong and his friend Dragon Lee resist their onslaught, but they are still no match for Ko and his new recruit, John Liu. But John and Tino are united by a common purpose. Both are the last descendants of the Stone Rock …

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Blade II (2002)

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Blade II (2002)

Incredibly silly and perfunctory sequel. This exchanges the substance of the original film with bigger, faster thrills – more gore, more CGI, more kung fu. Most of it seems completely unnecessary, and the film is worryingly garbled and trashy viewing. Blade (Snipes) is recruited by the bitey critters he loathes to train the Blood Pack in their quest to take on a new monster which feeds on both humans and vampires. The writers seem to be making up the rules as they go along, and although the performances aren’t totally inept, the script lets things down. Not even Donnie Yen …

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Taoism Drunkard (1984)

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Taoism Drunkard (1984)

In the absence of Yuen Woo-ping, his brother Yuen Cheung-yan steps up to direct this third installment in the Yuen clan’s nutty Miracle Fighters series. The film retains the admirable insanity of the previous films even if this one is particularly disjointed, jumping between tricks at breakneck speed. The most memorable oddity in this demented film is a giant cannonball with legs, eyes, and a snapping jaw which traps its adversaries with extendable antennae and suction pads. It’s almost as mad as that kid in the urn from the first film, and the poisonous toad in Shaolin Drunkard. Yuen Yat-chor plays …

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Blade (1998)

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Blade (1998)

Judging by the hyper violence, the tortured antihero and the gruesome horror, it is abundantly clear that the story of vampire hunter Blade is comic book based. But this is much more than just an aggressive episode of Buffy: The Vampire Slayer. It’s more Batman than Dracula, and given how the film’s gothic style predates movies like The Matrix, you could argue that Norrington’s wild supernatural action film was something of a trendsetter.

This gripping nightmare possesses all the hallmarks of a long-running franchise with much of the film’s substance deriving from the personal demons of our hard-bitten hero. The bloodletting and kung …

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The Black Sheep Affair (1998)

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The Black Sheep Affair (1998)

Pseudo political thriller that references both the Tiananmen Square protests and the Tokyo gas attacks of 1995, this disjointed escapade skims over any serious social commentary in favour of smoke and guns. Tony Ching’s wire fu choreography is used in the context of a contemporary setting with very little cohesion despite some fine work from the movie’s star, Vincent Zhao, who is every bit as capable as Jet Li but about as charming as wet cement. He plays a bulletproof Special Forces operative who is sent to Lavernia (Russia) to help out at the Chinese embassy when a crazy Japanese …

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Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

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Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

Colourful cult excitement from fantasy maestro John Carpenter. Jack Burton (Russell) wants his truck back. It has been nabbed by a clan of creepy Chinese kung fu magicians deep in the heart of San Francisco’s Chinatown, which resembles a Narnia-esque underworld led by age-old mystic Lo Pan (Hong) whose 2,000 year search for a sacrificial bride with green eyes may soon be at an end. He kidnaps the girlfriend of Burton’s kung fu buddy and also sneaks off with his green-eyed girlfriend Kim Cattrall, which pisses Jack off, so he attempts to rescue her. But Lo Pan’s forces are formidable; …

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